Monday, April 20, 2009

Shubho and Me-1

Shubho(after being awoken at 3am): What happened ... ? Are you ok?
Me: I have a question. If I reallly like a guy and I suspect him to be gay, would you sleep with him to find out?

Shubho: Silence. Long Silence. What do you want me to say?

Me: If you say yes, means you treasure my friendship and are a little gay. If you say no, you're possessive about me and can't see me with someone else.

Shubho: Silence. Long Silence.

Me: u there?

Shubho: Aaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...!!!

Me: hhehehehhehhe...

Now that's what I call falling into a peaceful sleep.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

A Moment...

This is an exclusive interview brought to you not by sponsors.. but by our very own Google Talk. 
An excerpt from a recent conversation with Kunal Jena... Applause for him and hoots for me!  

me:  ok so dear kunal.. hv u ever participated in a beauty paegent?

 Kunal:  do fancy dress competitions count??

 me:  yes.

 Kunal:  then yes
 
me:  ok.. i will still give u a chance fer fame..so welcome to A Moment with me..Give me three words I can use to describe you.

Kunal:  rebellious
head strong
and "meechke"

me:  indulgent, i say. Now if i gave you a choice between being drunk and stoned, you would?!

 Kunal:  oooohhhh
hobson's choice
get stoned i guess

me: and in that stoned state, if a guy cd screw you, you'd wish it was?
Kunal: a guy??
me: you're stoned. how does it matter?

Kunal: ok ok- johnny depp
me: wow. we hv a similar taste in men.
  
So yeah.. my next question.. if you had the power, you be the King of What Kingdom?

Kunal: hmmmm...yes i got it...i'd be the king of Axeland
 
me: hehehe.. ok...now if you had to advocate a social cause.. it would be : Free Sex or Free Hugs?

Kunal: what dyu think it' be
  
me: no no u answer. i only ask. im d supreme power.
 
Kunal: ok high and mighty...of course sex
 
me: spoken like a man. So in your years of bored existence, you have felt the desperate need for...?

Kunal: free sex

me: ah!! in your death... your last words wd be?

Kunal: i havent copped it yet....roll me a joint

me: if u had a beanstalk... u wd climb it to find wt at the end...
 
Kunal: a land where beer bottles grow on trees with beer in them of course
 
me: heheheh...ok... if u had to drug one of yr roomies to a 12 hour sleep.. who wd it be?

Kunal: considering that one of them is never around, it would have to be the tall one

me: aha!! from your gtalk list rt now (the ones which r online), who would you want to send to a striptease?!
 
Kunal: you...you even have to ask??
 
me: :P fucker.
UKC / AS... which one wd u hang on a tree upside down, and which one would u leave ina room fulll of rats?

Kunal: AS - hang upside down by a certain body part. UKC - room full of rats
 
me: hehehehe.. difficult decision eh?
ok.. now consider yourself to be God.. i know its horrible.. but consider.
 
Kunal: i already do
 
me: in your creation, the first would be?
 
Kunal: a woman with more intelligence and less yapping

me: ur definitely not wishing for me... but i still will continue
 
Kunal: ill use you as the blue print
 
me: really now!? im flattered or wt... in your confused state of sexuality...would you prefer to become a man? (say yes or no)
Kunal: sexuality has nothing to do with that
  but watever..........yes obviosly!
 
me: ahaa.. lets still continue... if you had boobs... wd u pose naked fer pictures? (please note, im ignoring the fact he wants to become a man)
 
Kunal: you even have to ask? of course!

me: my imagination is clearly getting the better of me... but i wl stillll go on...if you were my best man n had to give me away u wd gv me to?
  
Kunal: i'd give you to me

me: ok... id like tht...
  
(note: i wd like a platinum band..thats all.. no diamonds)
  
now mr. jena...
 
Kunal: yes ms gandhi
 
me: give one word.. and just one word for d following :
  
Apple:

Kunal: macintosh

(sheesh! he doesnt think Adam and Eve)
 
me: Home Video

Kunal: nothing 

(there's no fun in the world anymore)
 
me: Choose : Room 501 Vs Room 356?
 
Kunal: 356 everyday of the week and twice on sundays
 
me: (bastardddddddd. He has forgotten all those times he tickled me in class)
  
Beaches:
 
Kunal: lifeguards running in slow motion
(jus say Baywatch!)

me: Wooof:
 
Kunal: meeeeeeooooooowwwwwwwww
(no thats not pleasant)
 
me: hehehhe... whoever thaaat is. If you were Dr. Jekyll, Mr Hyde would be?
 
Kunal: remember my friend who was using my gmail once and you kept pinging??

me: lol... okie okie... embarassing moments we will not speak of..! (ok so that "friend" tickedddd me off)
 
Kunal: that was actually me- so that would be mr hyde
 
me: FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
(bastardddddd again.)

if you could pin point one defect in you (now i know u hv variety), it wd be...?

Kunal: i never seize the day thats why we never hooked up 

me: ( n i thot I couldnt woo men... the right men, that is) lol... if u cd use one thing to woo me.. it wd be?
 
Kunal: KFC 
(also think McDonald, mister! Readers, you shall not, and NOT think I'm easy.. to please, i mean.)
 
me: u know my T-point dude.. however... we will ask u one of our last questions..

if u had to be a brand ambassador, u wd be it for : Rhythm Condoms... Leopold... or Landmark?
 
Kunal: leopold 
(I could try re-writing Shantaram)
  
me: aha... and the words you would have for this conversation would range like?
 
Kunal: one of the MOST fun conversations ive had EVER
 
me: lol.. hehhehee... and my last sentimental question.. if you had to ERASE one memory of me.. it wd be?
 
Kunal: ambipure...sorry
 
me: hehehhe...naaah tht makes me laff ( I will tell you the story later people..there are times when I falter, and its not always Evil.)

Now i dont promise u Heath Ledger like fame...bt some of it wl come yr way soon!
Jena.. i must tell u... Oriya or not, i love u!
 
Kunal: i know...i do too

me: n i love u fer being a sport.. for being stupid wen i want us to be stupid... and i love that u dont need to just tickle me to make me laff!
  
N i think those r d sweetest words i used on a guy in the longest time.

Kunal: and im glad that you used them for me
 
me: :) * free hug
  not followed by free sex.

Kunal: ill take it
(not like you have an option at 2 am)

me: :D there! tday u cn be sure The Great Evil Spirit will be kind to u! 'Nite! 

Monday, April 06, 2009

Rain Rain..come Again!!

To Do:

1) Drive... up and down and round and round.. all over Delhi!

2) Eat... grapes..chaat...golgappas...bhutta...ice lollies...Civilization, I'm coming!

3) Read : The Satanic Verses

4) Watch: anything!! ...oh especially Kameenay, with THE gang!

5) Talk : to Nana, Bhai, Priyumma, Manfi, Sana, Shazu, MyTree, Neha, Tani Partnerrrrr, Namita, allllllll...

6) Travel : (:D) wherever its not hotttt...

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Into The Wild...

So we're back! And how! After a myriad of experiences - and let's just term it that, we're back to the insanity which thrives on pure fun... happiness.. and true friendships! SIMC is over... and so is all the pain.. Recently at my placement interview they asked me what I learnt at this college. And here's what I wish I could say:
1)To have a bath in cold water and not complain
2)To complain and not expect anyone to do anything about it
3)To align to the demands of faculty which could range from tragedy to black comedy
4) To be bitched about and laugh at rumours... and spread some...
5) To know that someone or the other, somewhere or the other, is cheating on someone....siigh...and still pretend to respect them. SIMC is yeah...promiscuity at its best! heeeehaaaaww...

But why are we talking about a bygone era?! 

The world dear people, is still beautiful, it exists, with Goblin Eyes, Mickey Mouse, Finless Fishy, .... and Jerry...  ;) 

So the end of the financial year isn't just that, but the beginning of a new, and purer form of freedom... 

So no matter how hot the sun is going to be in Delhi, and how the winter chill will crack my lips, I'd still be warm with the friends around... Luhhhrrrv-li-ness!